Death and life

Standing on the edge of life, ready
To jump into the abyss of death, I stood still,
Looking back on my lost love, I felt betrayed,
Left alone by the one whom I loved the most,
Beyond life, beyond imagination, I began to lose my breath
Again, I began to nauseate, I couldn’t take it anymore,
Thinking of her killed me, her smile cut through me,
Blood oozed out, all my love, all my soul, and I felt

Alone…

I jumped…

Pitched head first into darkness, I knew the end was near,
I was approaching the bottom, I closed my eyes, and waited,
For the crunching noise of my love-sick head on the rocks,

Waited… waited… waited…

I was flying, this wasn’t death, this was something else,
I felt bliss, the brilliant sunshine in my eyes, I could feel
Secure arms around me, holding me close, a chilling warmth,
I thought I was dead, but, I somehow found . . . LIFE.

Surely an angel from the heavens, I found myself again,
Lost myself in love again, sharing passions, dreams, desires,
Our two hearts beat as one, destined to cross paths,
She is my god, my present, my future, my sunshine, and
I bloomed with her unselfish love, my past lay…

Forgotten. . .

Am back !

Dead...

When death reaches out for us, I pray,
That I die before you, I’d never bear to be
At your funeral, to see your lifeless face,
So beautiful even in death, or, touch your forehead
At the morgue, I can sense tears in my eyes
Even thinking of it, dear, so I pray…
Someday when I’m dead, you can talk about me,
To your grandchildren, and then I hope they say
“granny…he loved you so much…”
And I want you to not cry at that dear,
But, to smile…your beautiful smile.

Love...

You’d never know how much I cared for you,
You are my heartbeat, my life, my all,
My words may fill a page, not your heart,
Life’s beauty, a fate I need to accept,
But, when I look at you, I think, maybe,
It’s worth the pain just to see you smile.

They say loving someone is nothing,
Someone loving you is something,
I don’t need that something in my life,
I’d be happy with that nothing, because,
In my life, Nothing is everything for me…
My dearest.

Joy of my life...

Sometimes I’d approach you to speak to you,
And, then, something happens, mind blanks,
I get Alzheimer’s…I’m still not able to decipher,
It’s got nothing to do with love, but,
Something to do with YOU… My beautiful angel,
I agree, all the times we spent together,
Will remain etched in my memory,
No one can take it away from me,
I will live in my fantasy world, hoping
In my wildest dreams, I can be with you
Forever, but, I know my time is short,
Four years is all that I’ve got…

You know about me, don’t you ? I know my limits,
I’d never dare to exceed them, hurting you
Will surely kill me more than your silence will.
I don’t need the world to be happy,
I need you for YOU are my world,
The closer you are to me, the happier I am,
You don’t need to be perfect,
But you are so perfect for me,
In you, I have found myself, and,
In you, I’ve found the greatest joy of my life,
And, When I am wit you, I never want to leave…
My dearest…