Amatueristic love poems...

I give her many looks
For free.
Doesn’t she have the heart
To return one back?

She is so beautiful.
She admires herself on
The front view mirror.
I, on the rear view mirror.

Her eyes spark of life,
Knowing joys no bound,
My life yearns,
For that same spark.

I might never get to be
With her always,
But, always, without her,
I never get to be.

Life is beautiful,
You’re too.
My life never is,
Without you.

Life and its intricacies...

Seminar on life

Introduction:
Since the seminar was an activity cum speech I thought that it would be better if I could try to reproduce the dialogues I spoke so that we could get the feel.
Subject:
Hey guys! Let’s start off this seminar with an activity!!
Point your index finger out and repeat after me!! When I say where the ceiling is? You need to point to the ceiling and say there! Where’s the floor? Point to the floor and say there!! Come on!! Everybody after me!
Where’s the ceiling? “THERE…!”
Where’s the floor? “THERE…!”
Where’s the door?
Where’s the window?
Where’s the future?
“Everywhere… “
Some blank faces!!
The answer to that is you need to point to yourselves!
Have the courage to know that YOU are the future!
Have the courage to believe in yourself!
Have the courage to know that each and every one sitting in this room have the future in their hands and they can make or break it!
The future just doesn’t happen!
We need to create it!
Coz we own it!


Let’s move forward!
Pointing to someone…
“What’s your age? “
“18…”
“Ten years ago, did things turn out the way you wanted it to be? Did things turn out the way it should be? “
“….no….”
“Five years ago….? “
“ … No… “
“Three years ago? “
“No...”
“Last year? “
“Definitely no…”
“This moment? “
“No...”
Things never did turn out the way it should be…
“Five years from now, will things turn out the way you want it to be? “
“..Maybe…”
“All the things?....”
“No…”
“Ten years from now…?”
“No…”
“Thirty years from now will things turn out the way it should be?”
“No...”
“WHEN YOU DIE, WILL THINGS TURN OUT THE WAY IT SHOULD BE?”
“F**kin hell no… “
From the time you’re born, till the time you die, things will never turn out the way it should be!!
LIFE IS HOPELESS!!!
Consider this, you’re playing a cricket match and you need 50 runs off the last over! You know for sure you’re gonna lose! That will take all the pressure off you, won’t it?
“Yeah…”
Will you play without fear; will you play without any pressure? Will you enjoy playing the game?
“Yeah… “
That’s what I want you to get!
When you know you’re gonna lose in the race of life, play freely!
Play fully, give it your all
And then give some more!!!
How many of you out here have stage fear?
Slowly hands begin to rise! More than half!!
“Ok… I don’t know what stage fear is!! Please explain the sensation to me!!”
“You get butterflies in your stomach, you get nervous, you can’t speak, your hands start to shiver… “
That’s what is stage fear?
“Yeah... “
Is that so? Then even I have stage fear!!
Blank faces….
Yeah... how many of you think that I committed grammatical errors while speakin?
Some hands rise up…
Even as I’m speaking to you I’m nervous and my hands are sweating! Do you think I have stage fear then?
“No…”
Then what is stage fear?
STAGE FEAR DOESN’T EXIST!
It is something which we create as an excuse to not bein brave!
Stand even if it means to stand alone!
Move forward even when no one follows!
How many people come from the past and say I’m not good enough! I don’t belong! I suck!
When you flunked in your exams… I’m not good enough!
When you failed in something… I don’t belong! I suck!!
You know what’s stopping you from moving forward and hitting your dreams?
It’s you!
The only thing that’s stopping you is you!!!
You know what you need to do with these considerations?
I write on the board…
I don’t belong! I suck! I’m not good enough!
I take a step back, draw back my hand and then BANG!
I slam the board!
That’s what you need to do!!
There are two ways of running a race...
Looking forwards towards the finish line and running!
There’s also another way!
Looking backwards and running (imitating)!
Why don’t racers run that way?
Surely they won’t know where they’re running to!!
You know what the funny part is (laughing a bit along with the audience)…
THAT’S WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOIN IN THE RACE OF LIFE!
Pin drop silence…
Every time we run our race, the past comes out in front of us and shields us from our powerful future!
You move forward, you move backwards, you move forwards, you move backwards…
WE’VE BEEN STAGNATIN IN OUR F**KIN LIVES!
You know what you need to do?
(I pick up a water bottle.... place it on the stage...)
Whenever you run and the past comes in front of you, catch hold of the past, and thrust it into the bottle….
Catch hold... thrust it in...
Catch hold... thrust it in...
The bottle is getting filled up… quarter filled... half filled... 3/4ths…
You know what you need to do with the past now?
Pin drop silence...
I take a deep breath and…
Kick the bottle across the stage!!!!
That’s what you need to do!
I’ll finish by doing the activity once more! Can we?
“YES!!!!!!!!!!! “
Where’s the ceiling?
Where’s the floor?
Where’s the door?
Where’s the window?
Where’s the future?
Pointing to themselves “HERE…..!!!!!!!!!”
Result:
Though I never want to be pessimistic if I could help it, some hard truths need to be told flat in the face! Considering the overwhelming response I proudly declare my seminar as a success!!

Trust fall...

Trust fall

Let’s do something different! I’m sure you’ll be bored if I repeat the last seminar again!
We’ll do another activity!
For this activity, I need one representative from the audience.
Venkatesh stands up…
Applause breaks out…
Venkatesh, here’s what I want you to do…
Face the board…
Stand on the edge of the stage…
When I say 1…2…3, you need to fall back…
I’m not responsible if you break your head!!!
“Ok…”
1…2…3…
He just steps back and acts as if he fell…
No… I want you to really fall… fall on your back…
He shakes his head…
“Of course not…”
Ok… let’s give him an option…
Call four people from the class whom you can trust the most…
He calls out… 1…2…3…4…
Here’s what I want the four of you to do…

Hold hands and when venkatesh falls, catch hold of him and push him back…
“Ok…”
Ok… 1…2…3…
He falls… they catch hold of him and push him back onto the stage…
They all depart to warm applause…
Ok… What do you think you got out of the activity?
“You need to fall in life to be able to move forward… failures are the stepping stones to success…”
Good… but what do you think was different between the first and the second case of the activity…
“In the second case, he didn’t have any fear…”
Bang on the head…
I just wanted to tell you…
There are 3 types of friends…
Consider I’m running a multi-million dollar company and that I’ve lost a part of my money…
Well, I’m sitting there crying and the first friend comes in… he sees me crying and he also starts crying…
Does that help?
“NO…”
Well, I’m still sitting there crying and the second friend comes in… he says “it’s all fate… you can’t change it…” he consoles me… does that help?
“NO…”
Man, I’ve already got loads of problems, I’m looking for solutions…
I’m still crying and the third friend comes in… he sees me crying… throws an arm around my shoulder and says… “So what if you’ve lost a part of your money? You’ve still not lost ME! What’s a friend for if he can’t help you out of your troubles… come, together, we’ll recreate your business… together we’ll push your business back to the same level… if not, we’ll take it to the next level…”
Does that help?
“YES…..”
Just look around you… how many friends you have whom you can really trust?
Well… I just wanted to say this… I may not hang out with you guys at pizza corners or coffee days, but, when you need help, I’ll be the first one to lend my shoulder… no, not for you to cry on… but as a support for you to move to the next level… Trust me… Will you?
“YES….”
I walk for the second time, back to my seat…

It's my life...

This ain't a song for the broken-hearted

No silent prayer for the faith-departed

I ain't gonna be just a face in the crowd

You're gonna hear my voice When I shout it out loud

[Chorus:]It's my life It's now or never

I ain't gonna live forever

I just want to live while I'm alive (It's my life)

My heart is like an open highway

Like Frankie said I did it my way

I just wanna live while I'm alive

It's my life

This is for the ones who stood their ground

For Tommy and Gina who never backed down

Tomorrow's getting harder make no mistake

Luck ain't even lucky Got to make your own breaks

[Chorus:]It's my life

And it's now or never

I ain't gonna live forever

I just want to live while I'm alive (It's my life)

My heart is like an open highway

Like Frankie said I did it my way

I just want to live while I'm alive

'Cause it's my life

Better stand tall when they're calling you out

Don't bend, don't break, baby, don't back down

[Chorus:]It's my life

And it's now or never

'Cause I ain't gonna live forever

I just want to live while I'm alive (It's my life)

My heart is like an open highway

Like Frankie said I did it my way

I just want to live while I'm alive

[Chorus:]It's my life

And it's now or never

'Cause I ain't gonna live forever

I just want to live while I'm alive (It's my life)

My heart is like an open highway

Like Frankie said I did it my way

I just want to live while I'm alive

'Cause it's my life!

Life seems so much better....

I warned you that this might happen. I wished that the threat would remain a threat and nothing more but, again I lose. I succumbed to laziness yet again. I’m not able to thrash the disease. I don’t know why but sometimes you feel better when your life ambles out slowly, patiently that you love being able to just spend your time admiring the world and taking a rest. You don’t seem to have the urge to work, to get going and do something worthwhile. Well, that was what happened to me, again. That should explain my absence from the blogging radar for the past few days. People, please bear with me.


Anyway, this one week was living heaven. I mean, we had so much work to do at college and all but I liked the fact that I was working again and the fact that I was back with my gang of dear friends made it seem all the more better. My laziness seemed to restrict itself to blogging alone, I presumed, as there were no signs of it disturbing my homework and study pattern. Good thing. This college seems to get better as the days progress. Whether it is my imagination at play again or whether it really is getting better is anyone’s guess. But the food seems to be getting better, the teachers seem to be teaching better, the surroundings seem to be getting better, the buses and the transportation seem to be getting better and my friends seem to be getting better. Wow. But as akshay says, it’s more about your state of mind than the state of the surroundings. So maybe, it all comes down to the fact that I seem to be getting happier.

What's the problem?

Dear diary,

I’ve been really worked up these past few days and hence haven’t really found time to write. We had our results announced early on Friday morning and I’m glad that I was able to scrape through. I was delighted even as many of my friends fell prey to atleast one arrear. Out of our class of sixty, only twelve cleared all. To be one among the privileged few never held more value than in this list. I’m not going to write about myself. I prefer to concentrate on my friends who unfortunately messed it up when it came to the big test after performing so well in the earlier unit tests and revision exams.


Of course, I had the unenviable distinction of being the highest mark grosser in the entire college when I entered but I wasn’t interested in carrying the mantle again. I was sick and tired of reading for and writing exams for the past twelve years and I deserved a break. I had, after all, given it my all throughout and I needed to re-charge. I wanted to make my foray into writing blogs, starting magazines, enjoying life and mainly, allowing me to be myself. I was engrossed in it all that I missed my chance. Not to worry. This semester is mine.




I’m veering off course. Back to my friends. I had a stage, infact, I had many stages in first year where my performance sank to new lows and I had to make do with grades that would make anyone puke. I had a permanent place at the bottom-something of the list and I was pretty ashamed. Questions were asked of me and my temperament. People never did have any doubts about my talent and knack for grasping, but like Marat Safin, I was bored of performing. Teachers tried in vain to help me tap my potential and they were left exasperated at my apparent lack of interest. They were actually desperate and in a way, felt sorry for themselves that they were losing a potential top-ranker.


You see, though I couldn’t do what I frequently achieve with eyes closed, I wasn’t burdening myself too much. I left my life to God. I knew. He always helps me out. My friends were not so lucky. I assure you that they studied a lot more than what I did throughout the year in the fifteen days prior to the exams. I was shocked to see some of my best friends failing to clear the entire lot. Infact, some of them were so note-worthy that I had to double-check if the names were really the names of my friends.


People who actually aced it in the unit tests and people who could make teachers themselves made the list. Many of the girls who were my dear friends and whom I had high opinions of failed to clear all. I’m not revealing names here, even though I know that no one actually reads my blogs. I felt for a few of them as they were closer to me than other girls. I couldn’t bear to see them cry. But you see, girls have this remarkable ability to move on. Just a few minutes of loud tears and voila, a smile and a grin. Infact, when a particular N failed in two subjects, she had to be comforted by her girl-friends even as she cried. I was sorry for her as she had been one of the most important chapters in my friends list. When I came back from lunch, she was smiling and held up two fingers to signify the number of arrears. Two other girls who were dear to me, S and S, failed to clear a subject each.


When it became known to us that the results were out, we (exclusive of me) started to panic. One of my best friends, SK, held my hand and conversed in silence. I could see that he was afraid. He asked me whether he would clear all. He had his share of troubles what with the impending loan for second year studies and all. I had to do it. I said to him that he would pass without any arrears for sure and that he rest-assure. But, as luck could have it, he failed in three subjects and I felt that I had let him down. I kicked myself for having lied to him to make him feel happy. Was lying an option? I don’t know. Was lying the right thing to do? I don’t know. His destiny is not in my hands. But his path onto destiny? I had made it better for him.


Tears, remarks, tempers, rebukes, embarrassment, anger and dejection will surely be seen in ample measure in the days to come. People will look for short-term solutions. Suicide will be on people’s minds. All that goes through a student’s mind in the immediate aftermath of the results is definitely not an option. Look ahead. Life goes on. Arrears will be cleared, tears will turn to sweat, dejection will turn to eagerness, anger will turn to bliss, frowns will turn to smiles and we’ll all end up happy and content.
What’s the problem?